My Children, My Loves

As I type this I have so many changes going on regarding my kiddos.  I am happy, proud, sad and worried.  I feel time has flown by so quickly and I am remembering when my children were little and I was changing diapers, carrying car seats, mixing up bottles every few hours and walking around in public with puke and boogers on my shoulders very much aware I looked a mess and felt exhausted.   When seasoned parents told me to enjoy every minute because they grow up so fast I would look at them, eyes glazed over because I had been up with a baby every 4 hours not realizing they were preparing me for this time in my life.

Today, my oldest son is in Virginia preparing for his future in the Army.  It’s mid April and I was blessed to see him during Christmas and witness his graduation from basic in February but I don’t know when I will see him next.  I know there is a pretty good chance he may be deployed as I watch the news and see what is going on in our nation.  I don’t get to talk to him much on the phone because he is so busy and exhausted.  When I do get to talk to him I always hang up in tears because I hear of his struggles and I want to hug him so bad.  He is constantly on my mind and I anxiously wait for the next call from him.

My daughter, Hailee, is graduating from high school in a few weeks.  She will be home for a while after she graduates preparing to leave the nest and start a life on her own.   I still see her as the baby in the stroller with huge, beautiful blue eyes and feeling so proud when people would stop us to comment on how beautiful she was.  Dressing her up in cute little outfits as she was my first baby girl.  She is 17 now and she is gorgeous! When she smiles she lights up the room and her chipmunk chuckle brings a smile to your face if you are blessed enough to witness it.

Then there’s Nick.  He is 13 years old and amazes me daily.  He is outgoing, athletic, HILARIOUS, has an old soul and is so talented it blows my mind.  It seems he succeeds at anything and everything he does.  He can make me laugh so hard I cry and this happens often when he and I are together.  He has so many friends I barely see him on the weekends.  And when he’s gone I miss him so much because his presence lights up our home.  He’s constantly creating art either on paper or in his dad’s shop.   He loves children and they gravitate to him as children do when they naturally sense greatness.

Sommer Mae is my youngest and is my mini me.  She has such a beautiful and loving heart.  She is moved to tears when others hurt.  She has a servants heart and would do anything for others if it would make them smile.   She stays close to her mama and I know this will change as she grows older so I try to cherish our time together.  We bake and cook together and she even cleans the house to surprise me!  She seems so delicate until she plays football with the boys!  She has bruised the egos of the neighbor boys on several occasions.  She is so sensitive and sometimes her sensitivity is the enemy and it hurts her deeply.  I love spending time with her.  She brightens my days and I love having access to her beautiful mind.

I live and breathe for my kids and I feel the hurt they experience, I am thrilled when they succeed and I pray daily for their happiness and safety.  I know the day will come when my house is quiet, my laundry is minimal, the bus won’t stop at my house dropping off the littles that I waited all day to see and I won’t be running a taxi service to sports events and doctors appointments.   I hope my kids visit and call often and my grandkids are at my house so I can spoil them rotten.  Until then, I will pass on the advice to the new parents and tell them to enjoy every single moment because times flies and they will look at me with boogers and puke on their shoulders and eyes glazed over from exhaustion.

Now, excuse me as I need to go finish laundry before the bus brings my kids home…